Who Are You?
Updated: May 31, 2019
This is my first blog post in life and I am sooo excited to just share and express freely my thoughts on many topics spinning in my head.
This first one is honestly where it all began for me.
IDENTITY
Let me be completely honest, I didn't know exactly who I was until about a month ago. Right before I moved to Texas is when I knew who Dana was with out second guessing. I was sure of myself. Before the move I thought I knew myself until something came along and proved me wrong.
(you shouldn't allow your situations to dictate who you truly are.
Its so important to really know who you are as an individual. Here are some questions to ask yourself. (some questions I had to ask my own self.)
What makes me special/different/unique?
Adjective that describe me?
What do I stand for? Morals?
What are my beliefs that I won't let anyone persuade me from?
What will people say about you if asked at random?
These are some questions I used to help me identify who I was. I was so use to being something that I wasn't that I began to think certain things were me.
For example: if you know ME you know I don't like clubs and I don't drink or smoke or any of that stuff, why?
1. it goes against what I believe.
2. It dosen't make me feel good afterwards, I am not proud of the behavior that is displayed when I'm intoxicated.
But yet I found myself going to the clubs, drinking, even smoking to try and fill a void, to make me numb and not feel or experience my hurt, pain, anger, and embarrassment. This is what I mean when I said your situation shouldn't dictate who you truly are. If I was sure of myself REGARDLESS of the difficult time I was facing in life it shouldn't have altered my behavior. You have to stick with what you believe and not let anything persuade you from it. "if you don't stand for something you will fall for anything"
I never knew this statement to be true until I hit rock bottom.
so I start to answer the questions.
- What makes me special is my HUGE heart. I have such a big heart that I tend to allow it to override my better judgment sometimes. But I love HARD it's just who I am. I take pride in being loving. it makes me feel great inside.
- I am different because the things I do, say, and come up with I believe are meant for me to do and say and execute. no one else. My ideas, my creativity its unique and I am set apart because of the anointing on my life. Its tailor made.
- Adjectives? Awesome, God-fearing Classy, Intelligent, Beautiful, Wonderfull & Fearfully made, Constructive, Transparent, Real, Honest, Driven, Talented, Optimistic, Stern, Loving, Empathetic, Giving, Calm, etc.
I stand for holiness and what's right. (This was so hard for me to come to terms with because the world is constantly making everything seem ok and acceptable but its NOT. As scripture says DO NOT be conformed to the things or this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind... {Romans 12:2} ) I really try to live by this.
- My belief? Jesus Christ. I am a christian and follower of Christ. So I will never let anyone cause me to doubt Him and His promises. I believe He is real and proven Him to be the only King of this world. I WILL NOT BE PERSUADED.
- Hmmm.... people will say that I am Nice, Can have an attitude (just being honest lol), Loves God, Willing vessel, Someone who is there for you, Some one who is not afraid to correct you in love. A transparent, funny, hint of ratchet, abundance of CLASS, beautiful soul.
After answering these questions it served as a reflection and guide to who I am. It showed me things I needed to change or approve upon.
Another really great thing I did to help me find my identity was to forgive myself. I never in my life honestly forgiven myself for so many mistakes and things that I wasn't proud of so I wrote a letter to myself that no one else would ever read it went something like this (modified or else it would be 20 pages long lol):
Dana,
I forgive you for everything! I forgive you for doubting yourself, beating yourself up, being so hard on yourself, the mistakes you’ve made in your past, I forgive you for being an open book when you should have been reserved, for letting people in that didn’t deserve to be, for not standing up for what you believe in because you were scared, I even forgive you for not forgiving yourself sooner 😢, I forgive you for everything, including the ugly things. The guilt and shame it is NO MORE.
We focus on forgiving people and we forget about OURSELVES.!!! Forgive your self so you can heal.. it’s a step towards progression 👏
Your past will NOT define you, your mistakes will not hunt you , your shortcomings will be just that SHORTCOMINGS.
You’re then is not your NOW nor will it be your LATER. 🙌🏾🌸💞
I challenge you to answer some of the questions above. Give it thought and be as thorough and specific as possible. Also, write a letter forgiving yourself go as far back as you can remember !!! It points out the ugly things we tend to suppress and reminds us of the person we never want to be again.
I am soooo happy with the person I am now. I feel like I have totally recreated my self to who I truly am. I stopped caring about the critics and nay sayers. I feel free and on my journey of healing and growth. I KNOW who I am and it's the best feeling ever.
I encourage you to be your authentic self, regardless of who likes it or not. Be unapologetic about who you are as a person. Always choose to GROW and MATURE. People will appreciate you for YOU. The real you. Be blessed !